Quick Jabs: Chicken Sacrifices, Making Adrien Broner More Exciting, Using Boxing Equipment To Store Marijuana And More

We’re in mourning here at TQBR, since we lost one of our staff guys, Paul Kelly. You might’ve noticed he hasn’t been around lately. He’s had a couple other gigs in his life taking priority, but I was holding out hope that he would find some extra time soon, so we kept him on board officially. But he’s let us know he simply isn’t going to be able to contribute very often, and this saddens us. It was good to have him amongst us for a few months, and he’s said he might still contribute from time to time, so it’s not all sad.

There is cheerier news in this edition of Quick Jabs. There’s delusional news, and comical news, and business news. Quick Jabs is a grab bag of human triumph and frailty. Just look, you’ll see.

Quick Jabs

Maybe Bob Arum’s just feeling nice because he won a crucial round in his legal battle with rival promoter Golden Boy over bantamweight Nonito Donaire, but he actually expressed regret for saying that Donaire’s wife, in effect, dresses like a whore. This past week, he also complimented a GBP fight. I don’t know where this kinder, gentler, cuddlier Arum came from, but he is just adorable…

What’s with guys in the Super Six trying to renegotiate their deals? Carl Froch is trying to pay Showtime $250,000 to move his super middleweight fight with Glen Johnson to England, which isn’t uncool or anything, it’s just — apparently the contract for the fight at this stage of the tournament always held that it had to be in North America. He should’ve expected this. And, OK, there’s no good reason to have this fight in Atlantic City, since neither Froch nor Johnson are known draws there, and Froch is back in England. But Froch just wants home court advantage, after the fact…

When Oscar De La Hoya isn’t accidentally reinforcing negative aspects of his image by wearing corny sweaters (and standing next to an Erik Morales who looks like he got hit by a truck after Thanksgiving dinner — the “cash out” theory of his fight with junior welterweight Marcos Maidana tonight just trumped the “delusional” theory) he is doing at least one good thing as a promoter. Reportedly, he told junior lightweight Adrien Broner he needs to be more exciting in future fights. Let’s hope Adrien listens to Oscar, because that is correct…

Speaking of reinforcing negative aspects of one’s image, what was junior welterweight Victor Ortiz thinking recording a song called “Catwalk?” From the smidge I heard, he’s no better or worse than your average celebrity non-rapper, but when people laugh at the mere IDEA of you being a rapper, you probably shouldn’t do it, especially if you have a history of doing or saying things that make you a laughingstock. Ortiz should stick to trying to kick some ass in the ring. If he manages it, then he can do and say “tough guy” things more credibly, and, hopefully, with less comical titles than “Catwalk”…

The thinking that Roy Jones, Jr. keeps fighting because of his belated love for the sport — a theory I kind of adopted — took a hit this week with news that he owes millions in taxes, according to the IRS. Same old sad boxing story…

In “boxing’s most popular kids” news: 1. Floyd Mayweather also owes more money to the IRS. Surprise surprise. Also he bets on basketball games and wins sometimes and brags about it on Twitter. Mayweather is, at this point in his life, mostly in the “famous for being famous” school led by Paris Hilton and other vapid airheads! 2. Manny Pacquiao got a chicken sacrifice and “reading of bile” was involved! Funky. 3. Mayweather may take after Paris Hilton, but Hilton likes the idea of going to Pacquiao-Shane Mosley. The master rejects the disciple! 4. Mosley went to visit the Knicks and talked to Amar’e Stoudemire. The video below probably doesn’t contain the entire exchange, but I hope Mosley at some point lectured Amar’e about calling everyone in the NBA “soft” while he only plays defense on every third play and rebounds like a shooting guard! Exclamation points!



Amir Khan-Paul McCloskey (junior welterweight) is moving from pay-per-view in England to regular TV because the undercard is too crappy, and Khan is gonna give up some smackers, too. Despite some improvements on the pay-per-view undercard front in the United States, it still would be a nice model to adopt here…

Free agent news: 1. Lightweight champion Juan Manuel Marquez is looking more and more like he’s going to re-sign with Golden Boy. That means a fight with Manny Pacquiao is less likely, and a fight with the winner of Michael Katsidis-Robert Guerrero or junior welterweight Zab Judah is more likely. 2. Fernando Montiel was exploring free agency for 15 minutes, then re-signed with Zanfer. There were five stories between BoxingScene’s report on Montiel’s exploration and his re-signing. Hmmm. 3. The talks between GBP and bantamweight Anselmo Moreno have apparently fallen apart. I can’t imagine where Moreno gets a better deal than the one that was reportedly offered…

The Hatley brothers got busted for allegedly hiding pot in a boxing heavy bag. Now that’s hitting the pipe! Rim shot, aaaand that’s Quick Jabs this week, everybody.

(h/t on the picture atop this post to friend of the site Che, via)

About Tim Starks

Tim is the founder of The Queensberry Rules and co-founder of The Transnational Boxing Rankings Board (http://www.tbrb.org). He lives in Washington, D.C. He has written for the Guardian, Economist, New Republic, Chicago Tribune and more.

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