Friday Night Fights, Yada Yada Yada

Sometimes a boxing card produces so little that is noteworthy as to make a boxing writer feel like a patient etherized upon a table. That was the case with ESPN2's Friday Night Fights this week, and from there, there are two options: write a results piece filled with ennui or write nothing. Option A in full effect!

Lateef Kayode is still clumsy and can still club his way to wins over guys like Jonte Willis, even upon moving up to heavyweight. It's fights like this that remind us about how pronounced a gap "class" can present — Kayode is transparently primitive, but he still was able to dodge what Willis thew at him with ease, because for as ungainly as Kayode is he remains on a higher level than a lot of boxers, somehow. He eventually stopped his man in the 6th and final round when a hurt Willis turned away and the ref stepped in to protect him. Kayode isn't going anywhere and isn't even that fun to watch. He is only good to hear talk after fights. "I FUCK HE UP."

Somehow Zahir Raheem got onto a televised boxing card again despite scarring our collective memories with his "fights," and his opponent was Bayan Jargal, who once presented at least some forward movement and resistance but doesn't do much of that anymore. The junior welterweight fight had few moments of competitiveness, and what moments came were the result of Raheem not doing much, also known as "how Zahir Raheem operates." Mainly Raheem landed the cleaner shots throughout when he mustered any offense whatsoever. Some people on Facebook thought it was close. I didn't. Neither did the judges, who scored it 99-91 twice and 97-93 third. This momentarily made me feel subhuman but sometimes the judges get it right and the unwashed masses get it wrong, dammit.

Not even gonna lie, I couldn't get into the main event. Yenefil Vicente stepped into the junior lightweight bout against Juan Antonio Rodriguez in a battle of cornrows/ponytail vs. fauxhawk, after Arash Usmanee had to pull out of the bout with an ankle injury. Rodriguez used his height against Vicente, or at least I think he did. It vaguely felt to me like Rodriguez won it easily, but instead he won a close majority decision. Usmanee-Rodriguez would've been a better fight, even though Vicente-Rodriguez somewhat stirred the blood late. 

FNF ain't gonna be this bad most nights. Last weekend, the season debut, gave us something to talk about. This was a big bowl of unflavored oatmeal.

About Tim Starks

Tim is the founder of The Queensberry Rules and co-founder of The Transnational Boxing Rankings Board ( He lives in Washington, D.C. He has written for the Guardian, Economist, New Republic, Chicago Tribune and more.