Yep, that kicked ass. Well, have a great week, everybody!
*closes laptop, starts car, cranks up the Whitesnake*
What’s that? There’s more to discuss? Do I have to do everything around here?! Fine. Whatever.
In a deliciously thrilling junior welterweight bout, Jose Ramirez slithered into Maurice Hooker’s backyard and stole his title, his heart and, for a brief moment, his consciousness.
The fight, televised on Saturday by DAZN from the College Park Center in Arlington, Texas, was supposed to be a homecoming of sorts for Dallas native Hooker (26-1-3, 17 KO). Unfortunately for him, Ramirez (25-0, 17 KO) brought like six of his boys along and one of them just got out of prison yesterday and it was definitely them that clogged the downstairs toilet. Look, things got out of hand, ok?
In a serious contender for fight of the year, both guys took turns implementing their respective gameplans to near perfection. The contractually agreed upon I-go-then-you-go nature of the fight led to numerous momentum shifts as each fighter waited for their turn to strike.
This was intelligent, high octane boxing. The good shit.
Hooker is tall, even just for a regular citizen. For a 140 pound prizefighter, he can basically duck hunt with a fly swatter. That length allows him to fight from the outside and use his jab from a distance most fighters aren’t comfortable countering. That five-foot eleven-inch frame also leaves a lot of exposed torso, and it was clear from the outset that this is where Ramirez planned to focus his attack.
From the opening bell, both fighters got to work. Ramirez chopping away at Hooker’s body and Hooker firing long-distance shots from the outside. Two congruent puzzle pieces clicking together to form a violently beautiful picture.
That’s a magniloquent way of saying they were beating the shit out of each other and it kicked ass.
Yeah, you’re right. That does feel better.
Ramirez was credited with a knockdown in the first round that was later revealed to be caused by him stepping on Hooker’s foot. The call wouldn’t affect the outcome of the fight, but boy, wouldn’t it just be ever so nice to have the use of instant replay at the ref’s disposal to correct it between rounds? It would be quick, easy and accurate, and oh yeah, this is boxing, so nothing will ever change.
As the rounds wore on, both men somehow found another gear. Hooker would fire his battering ram jab from the outside while house hunting for his right hand while Ramirez strafed Hooker to the rib cage, attempting to pin him on the ropes. Setting traps and planning escapes. Strategery.
Much like having sex with me, the end would come shockingly quickly. In the sixth round, Ramirez connected with a massive left hand that knocked Hooker back to the ropes. Ramirez pounced on his wounded prey with ten unanswered punches, prompting referee Mark Nelson to put a halt to the action.
And just like that, it was over.
It was a salacious display of sanctioned violence, bordering on pornographic.
A clearly dejected Hooker (great band name) would not protest the stoppage as the two combatants embraced in the center of the ring. The loss hurts, but Hooker has no reason to hang his head. This was the type of fight, and performance, that takes the sting off adding that first digit to your loss column.
Ramirez now awaits the winner of Regis Prograis and Josh Taylor and just thinking about that fight is going to make it hard to finish this column as typing with an erection is next to impossible.
Wherever Jose Ramirez goes, violence isn’t too far behind. As his star rises in the sport, more big fights and legendary nights are sure to follow.
Plus he can now swap stories with Oscar De La Hoya about the time he too nearly beat a hooker to death.
You gotta love it.
(Photo by Ed Mulholland/Matchroom Boxing USA)
