Kathy Duva, president of the promotional firm Main Events, announced today that the Fight Night boxing card scheduled to air on NBC in December will be sponsored by 10-10-220, the long distance telephone service.
“Who better to support boxing’s return to network television than a company that hasn’t been relevant since the time when being on network television actually meant something?” Duva asked rhetorically.
“We are proud to present a marginalized sport in a time slot when hardly anybody will be watching with financial backing from a company nobody uses anymore,” she said. “And being on NBC, a network that is a common punch line among television industry insiders and even its own shows for failing to rank ahead of Univision most nights in the ratings, is just the icing on the cake.”
10-10-220 rose to prominence for a brief period in the mid-1990s thanks to ubiquitous television commercials featuring B-level celebrities.
However, the company was quickly marginalized by a rise in rates and the rapid proliferation of cell phones.
“First of all, yes, we still exist,” said 10-10-220 CEO Dick Drickpo, who also serves as the company’s public relations chief, CFO, secretary and only customer service representative. “Second, we couldn’t be more excited about this opportunity. My research shows that the type of people who will be watching boxing on NBC from 4:00 to 6:00 PM on the Saturday before Christmas are exactly the kind of people who would use a service like 10-10-220 in 2012. So we’re pulling out all the stops.”
Hulk Hogan and Alf, who were both prominently featured in the company’s cheesy but effective advertising in its heyday, are scheduled to make appearances at the show, according to Drickpo.
“When you put together boxing, NBC, and 10-10-220, and then you add Hulk Hogan and Alf to the mix… well, all I can say is that everybody better set their VCRs for this one,” he said.
(The Rabbit Punch is a satirical column. Any persons, events, descriptions, opinions, or insults contained herein are not intended to be taken seriously. You didn’t take this seriously, did you? Seriously? Then send your complaints on Twitter to @SDKraus and await my indifference.)
